Psychology 102
by Sen the Wanderer
Summary: When the members of Quartet Night discover the cause behind Ren's sudden collapse, they are horrified. Then Reiji stumbles across a tasteless torture fic about his juniors...Everything goes downhill from there as Quartet Night embarks on a massive manhunt to find the sick masochist responsible for this outrage. Sequel to Psychology 101!


**Disclaimer: **I don't own Uta no Prince-sama. It belongs to Broccoli and the UtaPri Project~

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"Kyaa! I _finally _got a reply from Otoyan!" squealed Reiji as he rapidly clicked around the screen, signing back into his email. His eager expression frightened the man seated behind him, his band-mate Ranmaru.

"Is Ren out of the hospital yet?" asked a monotone voice in the background.

Reiji bobbed his head, his hair bouncing in time. "Yep! He just returned to activities this afternoon!"

"What caused him to collapse in the first place, I wonder?" came Camus's sharp voice as he put his magazine down and stretched across the sofa. He leaned back and laid his bare feet in Ai's lap, yawning. Turning his eyes toward Ranmaru, he teased, "You really should take better care of your juniors. I feel sorry for Masato and Ren..."

"Shut it, diva. No one asked your opinion," grumbled the bass player. He could feel Reiji's disapproving gaze on his back, so he straightened himself and kept mumbling, "Well, what? He's always giving me shit…"

Ai cocked his head to one side with a squeak. "I would like to know the cause behind Ren's collapse as well. He didn't seem ill when last we met."

"Hmm…" Reiji hummed as he read through the email Otoya had sent him. The details leading to Ren's trip to the emergency room were quite amusing. Reiji sputtered and giggled, covering his mouth so as not to laugh out loud.

Ranmaru, ignoring Camus's glares and other bodily noises aimed at pissing him off, looked over Reiji's shoulder. He squinted and leaned forward, trying to make out the words in Otoya's email. His eyes widened when he saw the link to the website that started it all.

"T-That's what triggered it? _That place,_" he said in a deep, grave tone. "So, what is this 'fan fiction' that Otoya's blabbing about?"

Metal creaked and reeled as Ai answered, "Fan Fiction, a noun. The proper definition is 'fiction written by a fan of, and featuring characters from, a particular TV series, movie, etc.'"

Camus rose from the sofa and tugged on Ai's arm, muttering, "Come on, Pinocchio. You could use some oil right about now…"

The blue-haired robot shrugged and followed his companion into the hallway. Reiji and Ranmaru were glued to the laptop, though. Chuckles and snickers echoed around the dressing room as they browsed through the website Otoya pointed them to.

Silence pervaded the scene suddenly, when Reiji found a story exclusively featuring him and his childhood friend. His wobbly smile flopped into a frown as he read the author's note at the beginning of the story. He could hear Ranmaru behind him, cursing and mumbling again.

"Why would they write a fan fiction based off some tacky film and then associate _us_ with it?" he griped.

Ranmaru continued to read through the story and felt his insides shudder. "What the _hell_ is this? It's no wonder as to why Ren passed out in a pile of his own vomit. This shit reeks…"

The older boy carried on with his rant, "And, despite my cheery disposition, I _can't stand _Disney films. Those people know about as much originality as this girl does. Oh, and for the record, I would _never _kiss you, Ran-Ran. God only knows where your lips have been…"

"Eh, who asked you?" spat his fellow member.

Reiji didn't respond that time, which got Ranmaru's curiosity going. He took another swig of his beer and turned to see what his friend was up to. He waved his hands in front of Reiji's face, and still received no reply. Groaning, he glanced down at the other man's face…

Color abandoned Reiji's cheeks and warmth fled from his eyes. His mouth hung open slightly and he pointed at the screen, his finger shaking. Ranmaru couldn't recall the last time he'd seen him so distraught; ah, that was a lie. There was that one time when Reiji shrieked like a girl and clambered on top the sinks in the bathroom because he spotted a roach…

"What is this? Torture porn?" Ranmaru asked in a dry voice as he read the story that had traumatized his friend. He twisted his mouth and grimaced. "Damn, I don't know which is worse: Their writing or the hell they're putting our juniors through…"

"This is pretty bad," remarked Camus, startling Ranmaru.

"W-When…H-How…?!"

Beeping sounds filled the room as Reiji whipped his cell phone out. He was sweating badly, and was quite frantic as he whispered to the other person through the phone. When Ranmaru tried to ask him what he was doing, he waved his hand and quickly answered, "I'm calling the Agency's attorney!"

Camus sat in his usual spot on the sofa, with Ai beside him, and said in a casual manner, "Even if we can sue this idiot for slander, I doubt we'd get much out of her."

The robot spoke up, "What led you to that assumption?"

"Hey Reiji," Ranmaru shouted, "there's some dude on here impersonating Ren! Tell 'em that and we'll have a case for sure!"

Camus laughed and picked up his magazine. "Think about it, Ai. The author is obviously some attention-deprived masochist still living in her parents' basement if she writes outlandish stories like that."

"Or maybe that bastard Eichi wrote it to make them look bad!" hollered Ranmaru as he pumped his fists in the air, quite riled up at this point.

"IT'S ALL A CONSPIRACY!" screamed Ai, shocking everyone. He glanced around and shrugged, taking his seat beside Camus once more. "That is to say, I agree with Ranmaru."

Ranmaru staggered forward and hiccupped, grabbing his empty beer bottle. He stomped past Camus and grabbed Ai by the arm, urging him, "Let's kick some ass, Tin Man! You coming, blondie?!"

"Oh no, no," Camus said with a laugh. "You boys go ahead and clean house without me. Such intense physical activity isn't any good for an old man my age…"

Ranmaru nodded firmly and dragged his artificial friend into the corridor, intent upon eradicating HEAVENS from the face of the planet. Camus peered out the door and giggled.

"Idiot…"

He almost gave up the ghost when Reiji snatched him by the collar of his shirt and tugged on it forcefully. Camus looked up at him and grunted, "Gee, thanks, Kotobuki-san~ I may never have the hiccups again…"

"This is serious, Camus," said the other man with fierce determination.

Heaving a sigh, Camus dropped his magazine and grabbed his jacket. As they left the room, he suggested in a darker voice, "So, would you be opposed to finding whoever is responsible for this racket and sicking Ai on them? His defense systems were recently upgraded…"

"That's no way to handle such a delicate matter," replied Reiji, his voice softer. A devious grin illuminated his pretty face as he continued, "We'll just have to make them suffer the humiliation they thrust upon our precious juniors! Ne, Myu-chan?"

Camus felt a shiver race along his spine as Reiji turned and smiled at him. But he found himself smiling in return, more than willing to go along with his plan…

Hours later, police were called to a scene _most strange. _For some reason, the members of the boy band, HEAVENS, were scattered in the front yard of a suburban home, bloody and beaten. Above them was a girl tied to a tree with a sign taped above her, detailing her crimes against the Shining Agency.

Lesson learned? _If you're going to go through the trouble of inciting mommy Reiji's wrath, then at least be able to do so with dignity, proper English, and a living will/testament made out._

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**Author's Notes: **This is a sequel and Quartet Night version of Gakumi's original story, 'Psychology 101.' I wrote this with her permission and supervision. I like to think of Reiji as QN's Mother Goose figure. He is the oldest, after all. Who knows what truly lies behind that energetic smile of his? Reviews are always appreciated! :D


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